Before I even begin, I have a little PSA for y’all… The best advice I could ever give is to pay attention to your initial gut feeling about someone. It is always right. I can’t think of an instance where mine hasn’t come back to bite me if I chose to downplay my ability to feel people’s vibes towards me. If you had a DANGER warning on day one… they probably will burn you if you don’t listen. Stay alert. You will deal with significantly less unnecessary drama if you steer clear.
“Let’s start at the very beginning
a very good place to start…” -Julie Andrews
We’ve all heard the saying “When life gives you lemons…” 🍋🍋🍋
When life is easy, a lemon may get thrown at you and it will sting because you are human. You carry it for a bit and then drop it because it really doesn’t matter. It’s not complicated.
It is what it is. And it ain’t what it ain’t. 🙌🏼
But #adulting with a full plate makes it REALLY hard to deal with anything extra thrown your way.
When life is stressful, a lemon comes a long and you try to karate chop it away (because you don’t have time for these feels) but it still manages to get you. And before you can let it go, another lemon comes and now you are looking around like “WHAT THE HECK IS HAPPENING TO ME?!”
Asking yourself this is dangerous because it can trigger a domino effect of WHY ME.
So picture yourself standing there bitter with your sour lemon-holding-self and due to the Law of Attraction… a lemon meteor shower is coming straight for ya. Our energy, our thoughts, our feelings can cultivate our own catastrophes. Let me say that again…
Our energy, our thoughts, our feelings cultivate our own catastrophes.
You go from thinking “I make things happen” to “things are happening to me.” This is a slippery slope to Victim Town. A place no one wants to claim as home.
Last month I stood in a bitter place for too long. I knew I was in a bad spot when I told my best friend over lunch that the next time someone told me something negative, whiney, or attention-seeking over the phone… I was going to pretend we had a bad connection and get off the phone as soon as I could. I just couldn’t take it on.
The second I said it, it made me sad. Laine doesn’t think like that. She wants to help any and everyone. She wants to give you the shirt off of her back. But Laine hasn’t slept in a while and she is currently carrying enough Mom-guilt to sink a battle-ship… so something had to give.
So I retreated and grew quiet. I filled every waking second with life-giving music and podcasts. Lots of Jesus. All love & light. Constant positive vibes.
***I also stopped listening to anyone that I felt was counseling me with ulterior motives.***
All of these positive vibes helped me drop the idea that these situations were created to take me down. If we want grace, we have to give grace. So I was on a mission to shovel out grace and let it go.
I was tired of driving the negative bus.
Something had to give.
And then my husband gave.
JT began to shower me with grace.
I could cry just thinking about it.
He came home from work and found me in the bathtub. I told him how hard my day was and that I was exhausted but I had so much more to do. He was so sweet about it and was sorry I felt overwhelmed. Normally, this is where it ends. We vent to each other and move forward. But this time he walked out of the bathroom and sat in the chair in our room and guarded the door. If any little came into our room to ask me to open a snack or fix a problem, he handled it and made sure no one bothered me while I relaxed. Can I get an Amen, Mamas?! Then I told him I needed to take a quick nap to be able to stay up all night reading. He shut our bedroom door and as I napped, he and the boys went to work. He scheduled a cleaning lady to come to our house the next day and he and the boys straightened the entire house to make sure that I did not have to do any prep work for her arrival. He did all of the laundry. He made dinner.
I walked out of our bedroom and just felt surrounded by goodness again. 💙💙💜💙💙
I had slept. I was feeling so blessed that they had taken so much off of my plate. And I had four handsome dinner dates to eat a yummy meal with.
I was back paying attention to the good stuff again. Like I had been stuck on the wrong radio station for two weeks. I knew I was close to my “happy station” after doing my own soul work but there was still static. And my man squad made that static disappear.
I freakin’ love them.
Sometimes I wish our family dinner conversations were recorded with a hidden camera. Of course some days would be boring but most of the time it’s hilarious. We have always joked that if they made a reality show of just our family meals, that they would make Bennett’s “Pit & Peak” the commercial breaks because sometimes he rambles for 10 minutes. They would cut to the commercial and then come back and he would still be talking 🙂
On this particular night after they had helped so much, Griffin had us cracking up…
Me:“Yah I like all of your buddies Griff. Y’all are all so funny together.”
Griff:“Oh, yah we call ourselves the Drunk Four.”
Me:“Um… You’ve never even seen a drunk person.”
Griff:“That’s just what we call ourselves.
So, the letter D stands for “Richard”…
(he points his finger at JT and I with a smirk)
You guys know what I’m talking about…”
Welcome to our frat house.
We never even made it to the letter R because we were crying from laughing so hard.
After dinner, JT and I layed in bed saying little things about each of our babies that we think makes them the coolest kids we know. I felt a huge wave come over me that this is what matters the most.
What matters is:
-JT showing our sons how to be caring husbands.
-Audrey’s face when she caught that fly ball.
-Griffin’s joy when he handed me his straight A report card.
-Cooper’s surprise of winning his team’s game ball.
-Bennett beaming with pride when I look through his folder.
The life we have built is pretty dang sweet.
Way sweeter than a few sour lemons that won’t matter by the time I sit down to write this post.
Surprise, they don’t matter at all now. But I still thought this post was super important as a reminder to give grace, surround yourself with goodness, & focus on your people.
That Saturday we had a get together with JT’s family for his Aunt Janet’s birthday. It was also super special because some family members from California were in town and would be at the party, too. JT had to work but he met us there as soon as he could.
At one point during the party I remember feeling like the lines had officially blurred. I’m sure that happened a long time ago but I just now realized it. This was no longer HIS family’s function. It was just a fun afternoon spent with OUR people.
When you get engaged, you choose your spouse to be your person.
But now I feel like it’s such a blessing to be apart of the family I married into and to feel like I fit here just as much as he does. Like we were all meant to be.
We had such a great time at “The Shack” and you better believe that I was tuned into God’s blessings.
Before we left, my mother-in-law gave me a little piece of Magnolia Market from her recent trip to Waco. Anything Joanna Gaines makes my heart pitter-patter but this was super special.
After focusing so much on life’s lemons…
I get handed a recipe for Lemon Pie.
The irony is not lost on me.
I’m giving you my love energy today✌🏼💕
And just in case you are dealing with a few lemons of your own, here is this little nugget from The Handmaid’s Tale… 💋